ENTITLEMENT I
Luke 17:1-10
Offenses
Then He said to the disciples, “It is impossible that no offenses should come, but woe to him through whom they do come! 2 It would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck, and he were thrown into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones.
Deal with Offenses
3 Take heed to yourselves. If your brother sins against you, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him. 4 And if he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times in a day returns to you, saying, ‘I repent,’ you shall forgive him.”
Faith
5 And the apostles said to the Lord, “Increase our faith.” 6 So the Lord said, “If you have faith as a mustard seed, you can say to this mulberry tree, ‘Be pulled up by the roots and be planted in the sea,’ and it would obey you.
Entitlement Mentality
7 And which of you, having a servant plowing or tending sheep, will say to him when he has come in from the field, ‘Come at once and sit down to eat’? 8 But will he not rather say to him, ‘Prepare something for my supper, and gird yourself and serve me till I have eaten and drunk, and afterward you will eat and drink’? 9 Does he thank that servant because he did the things that were commanded him? I think not. 10 So likewise you, when you have done all those things which you are commanded, say, ‘We are unprofitable servants. We have done what was our duty to do.’
I. ENTITLEMENT THINKING
Entitlement is the belief that I am exempt from responsibility and I am owed special treatment.
The online definition states, “An entitlement mentality is a state of mind in which an individual comes to believe that privileges are instead rights and that they are to be expected as a matter of course.”
1. An attitude of being special — “I’m exceptional — and in fact, I’m of far greater value to this marriage (or family, or company, or church) than the rest of them, and that’s why I deserve special treatment. They’re lucky to have me.”
2. An attitude of being owed, or of deserving something
3. A refusal to accept responsibility. Ex. “Why do they want me to pay rent? I didn’t ask to be born. Besides, this will still be their house after I move out. And I can’t pay rent anyway because I don’t have a job. None of the dead-end jobs around here are worth my time and effort. And there’s no reason I should do my laundry — Mom has to do hers and Dad’s anyway — she can just do mine at the same time. It’s no extra work.”
4. A denial of one’s impact on others — “Sometimes my husband and kids’ lack of responsibility bothers me. I say what I feel. I’m telling them the truth. I don’t sugarcoat it, and I don’t tone down my language, my volume, or how long I talk. They overreact to what I’m saying, and that’s their problem. It’s a free country, and I can say what I need to say.”
Entitlement attitudes resist pain. The culture of entitlement continually presents options to avoid the pain of all sorts.
II. SYMPTOMS OF ENTITLEMENT
1. The ability to impose unrealistic demands on your family, children, friends, acquaintances, employees, and employers.
2. When a person expresses sorrow for oneself, (self-pity), and openly advertise this in attention-seeking ways.
3. People have called you a “bully,” “manipulative,” “ruthless,” “egotistical,” “vain,” or a “liar.”
4. When you believe that you deserve happiness and go to great, sometimes extreme lengths to ensure that happens, often at the expense of others.
5. Another symptom of entitlement is when you punish people for not doing what you want. Either you punish them passively (e.g. silent treatment, gossiping, spreading rumors) or aggressively (e.g. shouting, verbally/physically abusing).
6. When you believe in order “succeed” in life, you must go to any lengths.
7. You regularly see other people as competition or “threats.”
8. You tend to exhibit many double standards in the way you behave/interact with other people, Ex. I can be late and forget my duties and commitments, but YOU can’t; I can treat myself, but YOU can’t; I can abuse or disrespect you, but YOU can’t to ME.
9. When you tend to take more than you give in friendships and relationships
10. You tend to look out for yourself, your needs and desires more than anyone else almost 100% of the time.
11. You have a hard time negotiating or compromising.
12. You have a deep-seated conviction that you have priority and should always come first, even at the expense of stepping on others.
13. People always seem to be offended or upset by what you do or say.
14. You think that you are better, or more important than other people. Other people should see this and should have an unquestioningly respect you.
15. You crave admiration and adoration.
16. You like to assert your dominance or superiority over other people, finding it second nature.
III. LIMITED ENTITLEMENT
1. There is a general entitlement.
a. Entitlement is the lens through which people see the world
b. It’s the norm in every category
2. There is Limited or Seasonal entitlement
a. There are certain areas where people feel entitled
b. Entitlement can also be brought on by stress, mid-life crisis, etc.
3. Entitlement is not just for young people.
Carleton University psychology professor Janet Mantler says she’s found evidence to suggest entitlement is going up across the western world, among every age group. In her decade of researching the phenomenon of entitlement in the workplace has been found, but the people conducting the studies tend to only measure it in youth.
“We haven’t looked at other generations,” she says. “So, are people in their 60s more entitled today than they were in the 1960s? We don’t know because we don’t have those surveys to compare. But we do have a culture of entitlement, and I have seen it in older people as well as younger people.”
IV. THE PLIGHT OF ENTITLEMENT
Entitlement has profound negative impacts:
1. It causes companies to deal with unmotivated employees
2. It causes parents to raise self-centered children
3. It causes unproductive dating relationships because of an “I’m special, and I deserve more than you’re giving me” attitude
4. It causes young adults to refuse to grow-up.
5. It causes leaders to expect special treatment because of their position, not because of their character
6. It causes marriages to be torn apart by the narcissism of a spouse
7. It causes ministries to be saddled with prima donna leadership
Professionals who wander from job to job looking for a place that will see them as the “gift to mankind” they consider themselves to be — whether they’re productive or not.
In short, entitlement has become a serious problem in our society, and it’s not getting better. It is impossible to calculate its cost in lack of company productivity, family success, relational love, emotional health.
Entitlement ultimately leaves you proud, alone, empty, and functionless
V. ENTITLEMENT THINKING IN THE BIBLE
1. Nebuchadnezzar
Dan 4:28-37
28 All this came upon King Nebuchadnezzar. 29 At the end of the twelve months, he was walking about the royal palace of Babylon. 30 The king spoke, saying, “Is not this great Babylon, that I have built for a royal dwelling by my mighty power and for the honor of my majesty?” 31 While the word was still in the king’s mouth, a voice fell from heaven: “King Nebuchadnezzar, to you it is spoken: the kingdom has departed from you! 32 And they shall drive you from men, and your dwelling shall be with the beasts of the field. They shall make you eat grass like oxen, and seven times shall pass over you until you know that the highest rules in the kingdom of men, and gives it to whomever He chooses.” 33 That very hour the word was fulfilled concerning Nebuchadnezzar; he was driven from men and ate grass like oxen; his body was wet with the dew of heaven till his hair had grown like eagles’ feathers and his nails like birds’ claws. 34 And at the end of the time I, Nebuchadnezzar, lifted my eyes to heaven, and my understanding returned to me; and I blessed the Most High and praised and honored Him who lives forever: For His dominion is an everlasting dominion, And His kingdom is from generation to generation. 35 All the inhabitants of the earth are reputed as nothing; He does according to His will in the army of heaven And among the inhabitants of the earth. No one can restrain His hand Or say to Him, “What have You done?” 36 At the same time my reason returned to me, and for the glory of my kingdom, my honor and splendor returned to me. My counselors and nobles resorted to me, I was restored to my kingdom, and excellent majesty was added to me. 37 Now I, Nebuchadnezzar, praise and extol and honor the King of heaven, all of whose works are truth, and His ways justice. And those who walk in pride He is able to put down.
2. Adam and Eve
Genesis 3:1-6
Now the serpent was more cunning than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made. And he said to the woman, “Has God indeed said, ‘You shall not eat of every tree of the garden’?” 2 And the woman said to the serpent, “We may eat the fruit of the trees of the garden; 3 but of the fruit of the tree which is in the midst of the garden, God has said, ‘You shall not eat it, nor shall you touch it, lest you die.’ ” 4 Then the serpent said to the woman, “You will not surely die. 5 For God knows that in the day you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” 6 So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree desirable to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate. She also gave to her husband with her, and he ate.
3. Lucifer
Isaiah 14:12-15
12 “How you are fallen from heaven, O Lucifer, son of the morning! How you are cut down to the ground, You who weakened the nations! 13 For you have said in your heart: ‘I will ascend into heaven, I will exalt my throne above the stars of God; I will also sit on the mount of the congregation On the farthest sides of the north; 14 I will ascend above the heights of the clouds, I will be like the Most High.’ 15 Yet you shall be brought down to Sheol, To the lowest depths of the Pit.
VI. JESUS TAUGHT AGAINST ENTITLEMENT OVER AND OVER
1. Sermon on the Mount
Matthew 5:1-11
3 “Blessed are the poor in spirit, For theirs is the kingdom of heaven. 4 Blessed are those who mourn, For they shall be comforted. 5 Blessed are the meek, For they shall inherit the earth. 6 Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, For they shall be filled. 7 Blessed are the merciful, For they shall obtain mercy. 8 Blessed are the pure in heart, For they shall see God. 9 Blessed are the peacemakers, For they shall be called sons of God. 10 Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, For theirs is the kingdom of heaven.11 “Blessed are you when they revile and persecute you, and say all kinds of evil against you falsely for My sake. 12 Rejoice and be exceedingly glad, for great is your reward in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you.
Matthew 5:21-22
21 “You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not murder, and whoever murders will be in danger of the judgment.’ 22 But I say to you that whoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment.
Matthew 5:38-42
38 “You have heard that it was said, ‘An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.’ 39 But I tell you not to resist an evil person. But whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also. 40 If anyone wants to sue you and take away your tunic, let him have your cloak also. 41 And whoever compels you to go one mile, go with him two. 42 Give to him who asks you, and from him who wants to borrow from you do not turn away.
Matthew 5:43-48
43 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ 44 But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, 45 that you may be sons of your Father in heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. 46 For if you love those who love you, what reward have you? Do not even the tax-collectors do the same? 47 And if you greet your brethren only, what do you do more than others? Do not even the tax collectors do so? 48 Therefore you shall be perfect, just as your Father in heaven is perfect.
2. Social Expectation
Luke 14:7-11
7 So He told a parable to those who were invited, when He noted how they chose the best places, saying to them: 8 “When you are invited by anyone to a wedding feast, do not sit down in the best place, lest one more honorable than you be invited by him; 9 and he who invited you and him come and say to you, ‘Give place to this man,’ and then you begin with shame to take the lowest place. 10 But when you are invited, go and sit down in the lowest place, so that when he who invited you comes he may say to you, ‘Friend, go up higher.’ Then you will have glory in the presence of those who sit at the table with you. 11 For whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted.”
