His and Her’s
Discovering biblical Marriage rolls
Antidote for culture
Antidote: A medicine taken to counteract a particular poison.this is good are there any others
Biblical Teaching VS. Anecdotal
Anecdotal: Based on personal accounts rather than facts or research
Biblical Truth: All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for
reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness. (2 Timothy 3:16)
Anecdotal Cultural
Examples Biblical Truth (Opposite)
Subjective personal
experiences Objective biblical authority (2 Timothy 3:16-17)
Social norms that shift over
time God’s unchanging Word (Isaiah 40:8)
Human reasoning and
ideologies Divine wisdom (Proverbs 3:5-6)
Feelings-based conclusions Truth rooted in God’s character (John 17:17)
Empirical evidence that can
change
Spiritual realities that remain constant (Hebrews
13:8)
Cultural definitions of marriage
family
God’s design for marriage family (Genesis 2:24,
Ephesians 5:22-25)
Individual autonomy self-
definition Submission to God’s authority (Romans 12:2)
Culture’s Edicts
For Men:
Toxic masculinity narrative – Viewing male leadership as oppressive.
Passive husband/fatherhood – Encouraging men to be emotionally absent or uninvolved.
Career over family – Defining success solely by work achievements.
Avoid commitment – Promoting promiscuity and casual relationships.
Emotional suppression – Discouraging men from leading with love and gentleness.
For Women:
Radical feminism – Rejecting submission and respect in marriage.
Independence over partnership – Promoting self-sufficiency over biblical unity.
Career-first mentality – Devaluing homemaking and child-rearing.
Marriage is outdated – Suggesting marriage is unnecessary or restrictive.
Rejection of motherhood – Viewing children as burdens rather than blessings.
For Marriage in General:
Egalitarianism – Eliminating God-ordained roles in marriage.
Sexual fluidity – Redefining gender and marriage itself.
Divorce culture – Treating marriage as disposable.
Personal happiness over commitment – Encouraging self-fulfillment over covenant
faithfulness.
Casual cohabitation – Prioritizing relationships over lifelong commitment.
What does God want from Marriage: Godly Offspring
Malachi 2:14-16
14 But you say, “Why does he not?” Because the LORD was witness between you and the wife
of your youth, to whom you have been faithless, though she is your companion and your wife by
covenant. 15 Did he not make them one, with a portion of the Spirit in their union? And what
was the one God seeking? Godly offspring. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and let none of
you be faithless to the wife of your youth. 16 “For the man who does not love his wife but
divorces her, says the LORD, the God of Israel, covers his garment with violence, says
the LORD of hosts. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and do not be faithless.”
1. The Role of Husbands in Marriage
Ephesians 5:25-28, 31-33
25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,
26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the
word,
27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or
any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.
28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who
loves his wife loves himself.
31 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the
two shall become one flesh.
32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.
33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she
respects her husband.
Colossians 3:19
19 Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.
1 Peter 3:7
7 Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to
the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so
that your prayers may not be hindered.
Proverbs 5:18-19
18 Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth,
19 a lovely deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be
intoxicated always in her love.
1 Timothy 5:8
8 But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his
household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
Psalm 82:3-4
3 Give justice to the weak and the fatherless; maintain the right of the afflicted and the
destitute.
4 Rescue the weak and the needy; deliver them from the hand of the wicked.
Key Responsibilities of Husbands:
• Love sacrificially (as Christ loved the church).
• Sanctify their wives spiritually.
• Live with understanding and show honor.
• Be faithful and rejoice in their wives.
• Avoid harshness and treat them with care.
• Provide
• Protect
2. The Role of Wives in Marriage
Ephesians 5:22-24, 33
22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.
23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his
body, and is himself its Savior.
24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to
their husbands.
33 ... and let the wife see that she respects her husband.
Colossians 3:18
18 Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.
1 Peter 3:1-6
1 Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey
the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives,
2 when they see your respectful and pure conduct.
3 Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold
jewelry, or the clothing you wear—
4 but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty
of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.
5 For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by
submitting to their own husbands,
6 as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good
and do not fear anything that is frightening.
Proverbs 31:10-12, 26-27
10 An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels.
11 The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain.
12 She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life.
26 She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
27 She looks well to the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.
Key Responsibilities of Wives:
• Submit to their husbands as the church submits to Christ.
• Respect their husbands.
• Demonstrate godly conduct to influence their husbands spiritually.
• Cultivate inner beauty with a gentle and quiet spirit.
• Manage the household wisely and with diligence.
3. The Mutual Responsibilities in Marriage
1 Corinthians 7:3-5
3 The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her
husband.
4 For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does.
Likewise, the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.
5 Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you
may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not
tempt you because of your lack of self-control.
Genesis 2:24
24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and
they shall become one flesh.
Malachi 2:14-16
14 But you say, ‘Why does he not?’ Because the Lord was witness between you and the
wife of your youth, to whom you have been faithless, though she is your companion and
your wife by covenant.
15 Did he not make them one, with a portion of the Spirit in their union? And what was
the one God seeking? Godly offspring. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and let none
of you be faithless to the wife of your youth.
16 For the man who does not love his wife but divorces her, says the Lord, the God of
Israel, ‘covers his garment with violence,’ says the Lord of hosts. So guard yourselves in
your spirit, and do not be faithless.
Joint Marital Duties
• Men are called to love sacrificially, lead spiritually, and honor their wives.
• Women are called to submit, respect, and support their husbands.
• Both are to be faithful, fulfill marital duties, and work together in unity.
Strongholds:
Male self preservation, and egalitarianism:
Men are called to lay down their lives as Christ did for their wives.
1. Greek Word Study: Gave Himself Up(παρέδωκεν ἑαυτὸν - paredōken heauton)
A. Greek Breakdown
• παρέδωκεν (paredōken) – gave up, delivered over,surrendered
◦ Root: παραδίδωμι (paradidōmi) – to hand over, deliver, or entrust
◦ Used in contexts of betrayal, sacrifice, and divine surrender
• ἑαυτὸν (heauton) – himself
◦ Indicates voluntary action—Jesus chose to lay down His life.
B. Other Biblical Uses of paredōken
This word appears in other passages showing Christ’s voluntary sacrifice:
Ephesians 5:2 – And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant
offering and sacrifice to God.
Galatians 2:20 – The life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me
and gave himself for me.
Mark 14:41 – The Son of Man is betrayed (paredidoto) into the hands of sinners.
Female independence:
Hermeneutic Study of the Word Submission in Ephesians 5
I. The Greek Word for Submission in Ephesians 5
The word submission in Ephesians 5:21-22 is ὑποτάσσω (hupotassō).
Greek Definition of ὑποτάσσω (hupotassō)
Root Meaning: To arrange under, to subordinate.
Usage:
To place in an orderly fashion under a superior rank.
To subject oneself voluntarily.
To obey or yield to authority.
In a military sense, it means to arrange troops in order under a leader.
Strong Concordance Number: G5293
Verb Form: Middle/passive voice, often implying voluntary submission.
Occurrences of ὑποτάσσω in the New Testament
Here are some key places where hupotassō appears in the NT:
1. Ephesians 5:21 - submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.
2. Ephesians 5:22 - Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.
3. Colossians 3:18 - Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.
4. 1 Peter 3:1 - Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands...
5. Romans 13:1 - Let every person be subject to the governing authorities...
6. 1 Corinthians 15:28 - When all things are subjected to him, then the Son
himself will also be subjected to him who put all things in subjection under him...
7. James 4:7 - Submit yourselves therefore to God.
8. Titus 2:5 - To be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to
their own husbands...
The word is used in contexts of:
• Marital relationships (Eph. 5:22, Col. 3:18, 1 Pet. 3:1)
• Government and authority structures (Rom. 13:1)
• Jesus’ subjection to the Father (1 Cor. 15:28)
• Christians submitting to God (James 4:7)
II. The Hebrew Equivalent for Submission
The most common Hebrew word for submission is כָּבַשׁ (kabash), though there are a
few others.
Hebrew Definitions of Submission Words
כָּבַשׁ (kabash)
Meaning: To subdue, bring under control, subject to authority.
Strong’s Concordance: H3533
Example:
Genesis 1:28 - Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue (kabash) it.
Numbers 32:22 - And the land be subdued (kabash) before the LORD.
שָׁמַע (shama')
Meaning: To listen, obey, heed authority.
Strong’s Concordance: H8085
Example:
Exodus 19:5 - If you will indeed obey (shama') my voice and keep my covenant...
יִכַּח (yikach) (Less common in this sense)
Meaning: To take or accept authority.
Strong’s Concordance: H3947
Example:
Proverbs 6:23 - For the commandment is a lamp, and the law is light; and reproofs of
instruction are the way of life.
III. All Biblical Occurrences of Submission in Context
Below is a compilation of where hupotassō and its Hebrew equivalents appear in
scripture:
Old Testament
• Genesis 1:28 - Subdue (kabash) the earth.
• Numbers 32:22, 29 - If the land be subdued (kabash) before the LORD...
• Joshua 18:1 - And the land was subdued (kabash) before them.
• Psalm 81:11 - But my people would not hearken (shama') to my voice...
• Proverbs 6:23 - The commandment is a lamp...
New Testament
• Ephesians 5:21-22 -Submit (hupotassō) to one another... Wives, submit
(hupotassō) to your husbands.
• Colossians 3:18 - Wives, submit (hupotassō) to your husbands.
• Romans 13:1 - Let every soul be subject (hupotassō) to the governing
authorities.
• 1 Peter 3:1 - Wives, be subject (hupotassō) to your husbands.
• 1 Corinthians 15:28 - The Son himself will be subjected (hupotassō) to him...
• James 4:7 - Submit (hupotassō) to God.
• Titus 2:5 - Women should be submissive (hupotassō) to their own husbands.
IV. Hermeneutical Interpretation of Submission in Ephesians 5
1. Submission in the Context of Mutuality (Ephesians 5:21)
• Paul begins by saying,submitting to one another out of reverence for
Christ.
• This means that submission is not a one-sided command but part of mutual
relationships within the church and family.
2. Wives Submitting to Husbands (Ephesians 5:22)
• This is not about oppression or inferiority but about voluntary alignment under
God’s design.
• The model is Christ’s submission to the Father (1 Cor. 15:28).
• The parallel command to husbands (Eph. 5:25) is to love sacrificially, which
means submission is met with self-sacrificial leadership.
3. Submission to Authority in Society
• Romans 13:1 commands submission to government.
• 1 Peter 2:13-14 echoes the same.
• This means submission is part of God’s order, but not absolute—when authority
contradicts God’s law, obedience to God takes precedence (Acts 5:29).
4. Submission to God (James 4:7)
• The highest form of submission is to God Himself.
• It is a voluntary act of trust and obedience.
V. Application and Conclusion
1. Submission is not oppression – Biblical submission is voluntary and mutual,
modeled by Christ Himself.
9. Submission applies to all relationships – marriage, church, government, and
God.
10. Husbands are also called to submission – by loving sacrificially.
11. The ultimate submission is to God – yielding to His will in all areas of life.
