God’s Design
The Biblical Role of Husbands in Marriage
I. Introduction: Addressing the Design (Tension)
- Acknowledge the cultural discomfort with terms like “headship” and “submission.”
- That is a result of human sin— God’s design is for human flourishing in marriage.
Genesis 1:27
So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.
He created male and female equal in value but not role.
- Roles are not about value—but about divine function and order.
- Galatians 3:28
28 There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.
There is obviously still male and female…. It is not talking about appearance but value!
We are all equally valued and loved in Christ!
II. The Husband as the Head
In God’s design, there is an order!
Ephesians 5:23
For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior.
This order is modeled in the trinity.
1 Corinthians 11:3
But I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ, the head of a wife is her husband, and the head of Christ is God.
Headship is Gods design, reaffirmed in the Bible.
Biblically, what does it look like?
- Christ models it for us:
- Christ's headship was defined by sacrifice, servant leadership, and accountability before God.
Ephesians 5:25
Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.
John 13:14-15
If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another’s feet. For I have given you an example…
Mark 10:45
For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.
What are the practical ways headship manifests
- Protection
- Provision
- Spiritual Leadership
III. The Husband as the Protector
1 Peter 3:7
Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life...
- “Weaker vessel” = not lesser, but worthy of protection and care
(as with fine china vs. metal tools).
Nehemiah 4:14
Do not be afraid of them. Remember the Lord, who is great and awesome, and fight for your brothers, your sons, your daughters, your wives, and your homes.
Proverbs 24:11
Rescue those who are being taken away to death; hold back those who are stumbling to the slaughter.
- Husbands are spiritual and physical warriors—guarding their homes from moral, emotional, and spiritual threats.
IV. The Husband as the Provider
1 Timothy 5:8
But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
Genesis 3:17-19
...cursed is the ground because of you; in pain you shall eat of it all the days of your life...
- Post-fall, provision became laborious, but it is still God’s command and man's responsibility.
Proverbs 13:22
A good man leaves an inheritance to his children's children...
Proverbs 12:11
Whoever works his land will have plenty of bread, but he who follows worthless pursuits lacks sense.
V. The Husband as the Spiritual leader
Sanctify her with the washing of the word.
Genesis 18:19 (God speaking of Abraham)
19 For I have chosen him, that he may command his children and his household after him to keep the way of the Lord by doing righteousness and justice...
Deuteronomy 6:6-7
And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children..
Objections
1. “But this sounds oppressive.”
- Oppression is a result of sin and abuse—not the structure God designed.
Colossians 3:19
Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.
- True biblical headship elevates the woman, just as Christ elevated the church.
2. “Aren’t men and women equal?”
- Yes, in value and dignity. But NOT IN ROLE!
- God designed different roles.
- Equality in worth does not mean UNIFORMITY in role (just like Christ and the Father, John 14:28).
Ephesians 4:11-16 KJV
11 And he gave some, apostles; and some, prophets; and some, evangelists; and some, pastors and teachers; 12 For the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ.
Psalm 128:1-4
Blessed is everyone who fears the Lord, who walks in his ways! You shall eat the fruit of the labor of your hands... Your wife will be like a fruitful vine...
Joshua 24:15
But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.
- A biblical husband leaves a legacy of life, peace, and order.
VIII. Closing Challenge
- The biblical role of a husband is not about control—it’s about Christlike sacrifice, stewardship, and servant leadership.
- God’s design isn’t outdated—it’s eternal truth.
- If we find this to be a difficult teaching we have been swayed by culture.
Psalm 128:1-4
Blessed is everyone who fears the Lord, who walks in his ways! You shall eat the fruit of the labor of your hands... Your wife will be like a fruitful vine...
Romans 12:2
Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.
